Got No Reason, Got No Shame: The Fickle Artist

Art is so diverse that it is almost spiritual, you have the choice to put your faith in it or simply let it rot in your lack of aesthetic sense. I believe being casually changeable with using your artistic skills doesn’t necessarily mean it’s a negligence, (I know I seem to sound like trying to console my guilt over it.) But, as goes by the saying, “the prognosis can necessarily be only an educated guess.” Perhaps, my viewpoint regarding this deviation is my sense of exploratory. I started with gritty sketches of human figures – that improved as far as anime comic strip making, and with continuous practice during my younger years, I venture with realistic sketches using an ordinary pencil.

Skills, Knowledge, Abilities

The change of my lifestyle exposed me to the different sectors of art, which are the art of preparing food and the art of creating a scene for the reader. Cookery and writing tested my creative skills and resourcefulness where practical considerations of use are present. I consider my skill level in each artistic range as average, but I pretty much feel a personal sense of accomplishment with being able to learn new skills. Despite the insufficient budget to practice it, I somehow manage to come up with small projects. Like a simple writing hobby, some stuff I write may not really have the essential nature but the dissemination show that it gets attention. Hah! (with an evil laughter,) I can now call myself capable of many things, my opinion about it is the fact that artistic skills aren’t easy to measure since it is all inconstant.

wpid-wp-1421777985735.pngHowever, being artistically capable, I realize this makes others question my monetary income, it clearly insinuates in my attitude towards my career. My parents are often worried if I am offended by the unbidden opinions of some people, especially family members. And I always tell my parents I am not and will never be because insecurity is deadly. I am not saying I don’t have any insecurities, but I know very well the value of being contented. I learned at early age that comparing myself to others, particularly in terms of financial stability is simply a lack of intellectual depth. I may not be as fortunate as others who have successfully found their Big Break at early age, but it doesn’t mean I am not exploring my grounds to find mine.

I remember a childhood friend during our reunion said “Ohh! What happened to the artist in you? You are just a call center agent now?”

I smiled and answered, “I put my talents in a blender and then I pressed the ON button.”

Her reaction, a very perplexed face.





3 thoughts on “Got No Reason, Got No Shame: The Fickle Artist

  1. Reading through your words, it seems like you have regrets and you don’t know yet how to change your career standing for the better. I understand it’s a lot to deal with, and you are not the only one living up with that challenge.

    Liked by 1 person

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